For the people in long term relationships—do you and your partner still make out?

yess

Meh tbh am I the only one who doesn’t really care for making out? I mostly just do it when I’m getting drilled 😭😭

Yes! When having sex but also without it, when I'm not in the mood for full-on sex it's a nice way to have intimacy

@seechell literally same tho😂

@beesandhoney I do now but in my previous LTRs most of ex-partners were terrible kissers lol. So, now that I enjoy it and it’s with someone good we do it often.

It’s funny y’all have different feelings about it @seechell @Aurielle! Cause my partner and I (together almost 6 years) are just now realizing we have those different feelings too. I miss our making out days and wish we did it more cause it makes me feel wanted and I really like the intimacy of it. I would be happy to do it without sex, but also, it helps me have sex too. But she just doesn’t care for it all that much! We are poly so I can sorta get it from others but I want it from her most. I don’t wanna make her do things she isn’t into. I also feel discouraged it’s something we might not be able to have together

@bananass lol so true good kissers make allll the difference

yes all the time!

No 😭 I hate it lol. We’ve been married 2 years but together since 2018. I like some passionate kisses/heavy petting but I’ve always hated tongue with a PASSION lol

@beesandhoney is it something you guys used to do or has she never really been into it?

@mortie21 Fair! I feel like people really don’t talk about how many people actually don’t like making out. Cause I’m realizing it’s more than I assumed

@aurielle yeah we did make out more in the first two years. She’s said now that back then it was her more so wanting to perform and please me and do what she thought was normal. Year 3 our relationship was rocky and we even broke up very briefly. After that, I noticed we weren’t kissing the same. We talked about it & decided that making out was something that had “fallen out of the grocery cart” when it fell over, and it didn’t get put back in with the rest of the things. Weird metaphor, but I thought kissing was maybe something we had lost, at least for the time being. The last few years I’ve been able to make out with other partners, so I just enjoyed that and didn’t put any pressure on her to kiss me the way we used to. Then recently I was kinda like okay….I’m not actually happy with this anymore I figured we would have fixed this by now and I lowkey demanded we start trying. But she confessed that while it’s true our relationship issues didn’t help, she just thinks making out in general is not something she needs to feel loved and not something she even likes that much. So I retracted my demands, not wanting to “work on” something that she wouldn’t ever want. But now I just feel kinda confused and sad about it. Sorry for the novel!!

@beesandhoney all of that makes sense. I love the falling out of the grocery cart metaphor. But what about what you need to feel loved? Is it something that's in that space of even though she doesn't like it as much as you do, it benefits the relationship and your connection for her to try? Or if it's really something she doesn't like and would feel forced to do, is there something else you could do that would give you that feeling of intimacy and love?

@aurielle Yeah I do wonder if she’d try just for the sake of trying. I hate the thought of me enjoying it and her like…counting the seconds till it’s over or something. Part of me is hopeful that if we tried, it would do more for her than she thinks but idk. It’s hard to think of something that could replace that feeling exactly, but if it comes down to it I think there’s probably things that would help me feel more loved and wanted. I’m gonna keep bringing it up until we find some kind of balance or new idea 😬